Counting the Cost

If your house was on fire what is the first thing you would bring with you? If you could only take five things to a deserted island, what would you bring? Today I stood in my dining room with a lot of stuff around me. Coffee mugs from around the world, knick-knacks, picture frames, shower curtains, bedding, candles, photographs. And as I stood there with this heavy weight on my chest I realized this is the cost.

Over the last month and a half, I’ve deeply felt the Lord stripping me of every single thing that I can potentially find security in or do find security in. Whether it’s somewhere to live, a coffee mug from a place I love (I collect coffee mugs, it’s kind of a problem), or not having a car…all of it is being taken from me.

But over the last few weeks I’m realizing…I’m not being robbed. I’m not being punished. I’m not some poor missionary who’s losing everything. Rather…I’m gaining everything. You see, all these little things my soul has sneakily found meaning, security, purpose and identity in. I’ve trusted in these silly things that have given me place and honor. All of these things that say “I don’t need Jesus here. I have these things to take care of me.” So, Jesus has been stripping me of things and in return, He has given me the very best to fill those faith gaps. He has given me Himself! 

As I walk this road ahead, I’m reminded of Jesus’ calling of the twelve disciples.

…and [Jesus] sent them out to proclaim the kingdom of God and to heal. And he said to them, ‘Take nothing for your journey, no staff, nor bag, nor bread, nor money; and do not have two tunics.’

Luke 9:1-3

Jesus calls these men to forsake everything, quit what they’re doing, leave it all behind and follow Him. What a radical call! Even as they were fishing on the Sea of Galilee later on, He told them He would make them fishers of men. And these men immediately left their nets and followed Jesus. These men didn’t even take the time to count the cost! They just followed Him. Oh, that I would have faith that would act immediately, confidently and boldly.

Over the last 2.5 years the Lord has consistently called me to equip young leaders in Croatia to fulfill Christ’s commission through the local church. In this movement of God, lives are being changed, churches are being revived, and societies are being transformed. So as I sit in my dining room looking at all this stuff…I don’t even have to take a minute to think, “Is it worth it?” Just like the disciples left their cast nets, like they left their treasures, like they left everything they knew for the sake of the gospel and to be fishers of men…I am coming to find that Jesus is worth everything. I am counting the cost and following Him. There is nothing on this earth that can bring identity, purpose, security, belonging, anything at all other than Jesus.

So, I’ll gladly get rid of my coffee mugs, my plants, my picture frames, my mason jars, my furniture, all of it…because Jesus is better, He’s worth it, and I am ready to go and make disciples.


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